1 Peter 3:1-7 (3 of 3) Marriage as Transformation through the Gospel
[First Things] He is Risen, indeed!
Our prayers are with the many Catholics in Washington and around the world who are mourning the loss of Pope Francis. We pray for wisdom and unanimity for the Conclave as they meet to choose a successor.
Please let us know if you are interested in joining an in-person Washington discipleship cohort or reading group, have a pastoral concern, or are interested in our resources for churches.
Faithful Presence is looking for two interns for the summer. Please reach out to us if you are aware of someone who might fit well.
[The Devo] Marriage as Transformation through the Gospel
3 Likewise, wives, be subject to your own husbands, so that even if some do not obey the word, they may be won without a word by the conduct of their wives, 2 when they see your respectful and pure conduct. 3 Do not let your adorning be external—the braiding of hair and the putting on of gold jewelry, or the clothing you wear— 4 but let your adorning be the hidden person of the heart with the imperishable beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which in God’s sight is very precious. 5 For this is how the holy women who hoped in God used to adorn themselves, by submitting to their own husbands, 6 as Sarah obeyed Abraham, calling him lord. And you are her children, if you do good and do not fear anything that is frightening.
7 Likewise, husbands, live with your wives in an understanding way, showing honor to the woman as the weaker vessel, since they are heirs with you of the grace of life, so that your prayers may not be hindered. 1 Peter 3:1–7
Marriage, as created, defined, and intended by God in the Garden, was a manifestation of the image of God. This representation was not anthropomorphic, as though God had a body like a person, but was intended to refill the earth with God’s glory through their rule and cultivation of the earth, and by their relational harmony with God and each other. Unfortunately, in a foolish attempt to become like God, the first married couple decided to exchange the truth of God for a lie, which led to death through sin. As the previous lesson made clear, the Fall led to a series of curses from God, including,
“Your desire shall be contrary to your husband, but he shall rule over you.”
If this is the curse, then Christians must ask how Christ’s mission of making all things new relates to this aspect of the curse. As seen over and over again, the Incarnation of God through Jesus Christ was an inbreaking of the future New Heavens and New Earth, testified through miracles that repaired what was broken: physical ailments, hunger, disordered weather, death, and the corrupting effect of power differentials in relationships.
Peter is building upon what he has already said to these elect exiles,
As obedient children, do not be conformed to the passions of your former ignorance, but as he who called you is holy, you also be holy in all your conduct, since it is written, “You shall be holy, for I am holy.” 1 Peter 1:14-16
And,
2 So put away all malice and all deceit and hypocrisy and envy and all slander. 2 Like newborn infants, long for the pure spiritual milk, that by it you may grow up into salvation— 3 if indeed you have tasted that the Lord is good. 4 As you come to him, a living stone rejected by men but in the sight of God chosen and precious, 5 you yourselves like living stones are being built up as a spiritual house, to be a holy priesthood, to offer spiritual sacrifices acceptable to God through Jesus Christ. 1 Peter 2:1–6
In these texts, Peter is connecting the Old Testament call to holiness with an understanding that our salvation is not for us but for participation in Christ’s mission of making all things new. As Christians, who comprise the church of Christ, we are being built, together, into a spiritual house (Temple) to offer worship to God through Christ. The picture of beliefs as bricks in a house is helpful in that we must not only concern ourselves with our resilience, but also that of those around us, including a spouse.
Just as occurs with the relationship of Jesus as groom with the church as bride, the covenant of human marriage provides an opportunity for both husband and wife to grow in their ability and desire to show grace, to better see their need for grace, and to be formed into disciples being built into a spiritual house. With this as our guide, we must conclude that the process of making all things new within the covenant of marriage has great dissonance with how some are currently appropriating the vision cast by Douglas Wilson, Mark Driscoll, and others. Conversely, it also has little resonance with cultural pressure to eliminate all gender distinctions within the marriage relationship.
Important: Peter, as stated in the previous lesson, is not advocating that being made into a disciple requires or includes remaining in a physically or deeply emotionally abusive relationship. As individuals, we are called to fear God, and in fearing God, we are called to care for ourselves as his image bearers. As the church, we are called to protect image bearers, which includes intervening in situations of marital abuse.
As we have seen over and over again in Scripture, the disciple-making process often involves a certain amount of suffering and sacrifice.
The Transformation of Women through Marriage
Despite living in a potentially difficult and unfavorable situation in marriage, Peter gives the following instruction to women:
First, subject yourselves to your own husbands. This was a reorienting of their hearts to someone who was not honoring their wife as he should. Consider this the same as “honor the emperor”. As he has in each of the previous sections, Peter even takes them one step further and calls them not just to be subject themselves, but to do good. This phrase is intentionally repeated throughout these house-tables with the intention of putting belief into action.
Second, Peter is calling women to find their affirmation in Christ and how he sees them, rather than through social competition and external adornments. The phrase, “Do not let your adorning be external—the braiding of hair and the putting on of gold jewelry, or the clothing you wear— but let your adorning be the hidden person of the heart with the imperishable beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which in God’s sight is very precious,” seeks a transformed way of viewing oneself. In a difficult marriage, it is understandable to try and do anything you can to find value in yourself, including displaying your worth externally to receive back the affirmation (or envy) of others. Peter calls Christian women to live differently.
Third, Peter is calling the women to trust in their Father. “Do not fear anything that is frightening” is referring to the fact that we are fragile and finite creatures who do not know what is in store. The emotional impact of this is amplified through power differentials. Just as Sarah did not know what was in store when she departed to a country far away, or Bathsheba when David stole her away from her husband and then had him killed. Marriage provides an opportunity for our transformation into disciples as we are changed by the gospel.
The Transformation of Men through Marriage
Men are not left out. Peter calls the men to do something often difficult for men,
7Likewise, husbands, live with your wives (non-Christians?) in an understanding way, showing honor to the woman as the weaker vessel, since they are heirs with you of the grace of life, so that your prayers may not be hindered.
By using “likewise,” Peter is connecting this section to the previous section, not making a hard shift in the posture of the husband towards the wife. We should read for congruence, not distinction.
Peter instructs men to understand their wives and to move away from self-focus and towards consideration of the needs of the woman. In the first century, ruled by Aristotelian ethics, this language was a radical recalibration! The language here reminds us of how Christ knows his sheep. Jesus pastors us by knowing us and treating us with an awareness that we are the weaker vessel. Men, likewise, are called to do the same with their wives, even if they are not Christians.
Further, men are called to treat their wives with honor, like the emperor. We live in an age where we are trained to look for microaggressions and dog-whistles, ready to pounce on language as insensitive and bigoted. But this is not bigoted language. This passage articulates what is typically true: women are not as strong as men. The distinction and difference between the sexes is the entire basis for the current discussion around gender and athletics. Peter is not saying women are not good leaders, teachers, presidents, judges, or athletes. But it means what it means. As a result, men must not take advantage of the power differential and rule over their wives to force them along.
The words complementarian and egalitarian are not in Scripture. What is in Scripture is a pre-fall relationship with the couple as co-laborers, jointly charged with filling the earth, and also ruling it. As Christians, being formed as living stones, built into a spiritual house to offer spiritual sacrifices, men are called to live differently. They don’t force their wife to convert, or have sex, or live a life of subordination, but they treat them with honor.
Through the transformation of the gospel, the husband comes to direct honor to another, not to himself. Peter grounds this motivation for honor giving in seeing them as “heirs with you of the grace of life.” And I love the way Peter ends this, “so that your prayers may not be hindered.” What this says is that if you treat your wives badly, your prayers will be hindered! You will not find that listed in the section for women.
Marriage for the Flourishing of Society
Married individuals who find themselves working in the public square should see their marriage as a training course for how to work with others and how to serve their constituents, even those who do not share their beliefs.
Peter’s audience lived in a culture that found Christians irrelevant or extreme, and also placed a high value on a flourishing society. It is commonly acknowledged that Peter wrote these house-tables to instruct Christians in how to live differently and have a faithful presence. They were also given so that Greco-Roman society would not fear the ‘damaging disruption of society’ by Christian faith. It was common to believe that if people were disruptive to those ‘above’ them, then the ‘gods’ would not flourish their society.
Peter’s instruction for men and women would have put this fear to rest for any outside readers. As Peter calls the Christians in marriages with non-Christians to live differently and pursue a faithful presence, he is pointing out that it is through Christian faith, and even Christian marriage, that societies flourish in their fullness. Thus, marriage is a conduit for the flourishing of society that comes from the gospel.
As a result, we need to resist the urge to redefine marriage, and instead seek to define marriage as it has been given, as a means of proclaiming the gospel, as a means of transformation through the gospel, and as a means of pursuing the flourishing of society through the gospel. One thing that is true about
Christianity is that Christ never calls his followers to a level of suffering that he was not willing to endure. We will not be called to hang on the cross for our spouse who does not measure up to our expectations, or lets us down again and again. Thankfully, however, Christ was willing to do so!
Application Questions
How does the use of the phrase “Likewise” inform or reshape your understanding of this passage?
Reading from the perspective of a man, what transformations of the heart and mind seem most helpful? Most challenging? If this is you, how could you move towards better reflecting the ideals of the male role in marriage?
Reading from the perspective of a woman, what transformations of the heart and mind seem most helpful? Most challenging? If this is you, how could you move towards better reflecting the ideals of the male role in marriage?
Depending on your role, how would the changes that you could make bring greater flourishing to your marriage?
[Faithful Prayer]
Cabinet Agency: For the servants and leaders at the newly established White House Faith Office. Specifically, that they would accurately convey the power-subverting truths of the gospel to those they serve and that they would advance Christ rather than political agendas.
Think Tank, Lobby group, NGO: For the servants and leaders of Faith & Law as they equip Christian policy-makers on the Hill to more fully understand the Biblical worldview and its implications for their calling to the public square.
Weekly delegation: For the servants and leaders with the congressional delegation of Maryland.
Agency News: Members of the White House Faith Office have a busy few weeks coming up, as detailed in this New York Times article from last week. The Department of Health and Human Services has begun a massive revamping of its agency in pursuit of its goal to “Make America Healthy Again.”
Personal requests: For a couple returning to work after spring break. For a think-tank fellow as he rents out a property to a young couple just starting their lives together. For a former senior-level Hill staff member looking for work in their field. For someone entering a treatment center to address an addiction issue. For a Cabinet agency appointee looking for a new church home. For two individuals working towards the end of the semester on their Master’s degree projects.
[The Page, The Pod & The Stack]
→ Read this first → Jake Meador has a brilliant essay at Mere Orthodoxy on a gender-affirming bill making its way through the Colorado legislature, with serious implications for Christians, that is sure to result in a Supreme Court case: The Rotten Fruit of Obergfell: On the Kelly Loving Act.
→ Listen to this first → The Witherspoon Institute’s Deep Dive Podcast has an enlightening and helpful interview with the authors of the recent book, “Hopeful Realism: Evangelical Natural Law and Democratic Politics,” on how natural law theory can assist evangelicals in navigating public square conversations: Deep Dive: R. J. Snell, Micah Watson, Jesse Covington, and Bryan McGraw on Hopeful Realism.
The Lakelight Institute has a word-on-target from Ben Dockery on power, the public square, and the right understanding of the implications of the gospel: More Power to You.
The New York Times is home to the much-talked-about op-ed by David Brooks, What’s Happening Is Not Normal. America Needs an Uprising That Is Not Normal that pulls no punches in articulating an assessment and response to the current political situation in America.
The Wall Street Journal has an extremely important article on the role that Italian Marxist, Antonio Gramsci, has come to play in the culture wars in general and the MAGA movement specifically: Meet MAGA’s Favorite Communist. (Note: Our president, Rev. Michael Langer’s Ph.D. proposal is, The Role of Karl Marx, Antonio Gramsci, and Douglas Hyde on Modern American Evangelical Public Square Theology.)
[What’s Happening?]
Due to multiple requests, this section now reflects events for This Week and Next Week
This Week
Tuesday, April 22, 10:00 - 11:30 am ET, Brookings will host Strengthening global economic cooperation for a changing world: The unique role of the G20. Taking place on the sidelines of the World Bank and International Monetary Fund spring meetings, a diverse panel of experts will examine how the G20 can adapt to new challenges, strengthen its role in global governance, and promote inclusive and sustainable global growth and shared prosperity.
Wednesday, April 23, 12:30 - 1:45 pm ET, The American Enterprise Institute will host a hybrid event, Is American Civic Culture the Source of Our Challenges?, with Yuval Levin and Christine Rosen.
Wednesday, Apr 23, 2:00 - 3:00 pm ET, the Aspen Institute’s Law and Public Policy Center will host an online event, Getting a Job in Policy. During the event, their staff will cover the key steps to finding career opportunities and making a good first impression during the hiring process.
Friday, April 25 - Sunday, April 27, 11:00 am - 5:00 pm, the annual and ever-popular Georgetown French Market brings over 7,500 attendees to the charming Book Hill neighborhood of Georgetown as it’s transformed into a Parisian-inspired open-air market.
Next Week
Tuesday, April 29, 10:00 - 11:00 am ET, the Bipartisan Policy Center will host an in-person event, AI at Work: Navigating the Next Evolution of the Labor Market, exploring how AI is already showing up in the labor market, what policymakers and AI developers should keep in mind as they navigate this transition, and what the public should consider as AI becomes more ubiquitous in society.
Wednesday, April 30, 2:00 - 4:30 pm ET, the Urban Institute hosts an in-person Apprenticeship: Industry Driven, Made to Scale, to discuss how national organizations and system reforms can support and further scale this movement, building the next chapter of America’s apprenticeship renaissance.
Wednesday, April 30, the Center for Strategic and International Studies (CSIS) will host an online event, CommonHealth Live! with Dr. Adam Ratner and Dr. Ephrem T. Lemango for a conversation on measles outbreaks in the United States and abroad, bolstering measles vaccination coverage, and the importance of routine immunizations.
Saturday, May 3, 2:00 - 5:00 pm ET, District Wharf hosts the 13th Annual Running of the Chihuahuas presented by Pacifico and emceed by Tommy McFly. The fun-filled and free event features the iconic Chihuahua races, a Pacifico Beer Garden, a DJ, and a giant inflatable Chihuahua for photo opportunities.
[Two Thumbs Up] Fratelli Tucci (Pope Francis, 2020)
Popes do not typically write books, they write encyclicals to express their thoughts on spiritual, emotional, relational, vocational, ideological, cultural, and evangelical matters. In his third papal encyclical, Fratelli Tucci (All Brothers), Pope Francis lays out much of his “philosophy of ministry” for the Catholic Church and humanity in general.
Set against the backdrop of the COVID-19 pandemic, Fratelli Tucci helps us understand why Pope Francis was considered by many to be “the people’s pope.” The letter advocates for loving your neighbor as yourself as central to an understanding of human dignity, fraternity, friendship, and freedom from tyranny. It also tackles a myriad of social and economic issues, including: care for the poor and marginalized, global trade and cooperation, issues of gender and sexuality, wealth accumulation and the markets, and the ever-present concern over war.
As we reflect on the life of the most recent pontiff, Fratelli Tucci provides insight into his priorities and hoped-for legacy. It is also an excellent opportunity to consider afresh what it means to live in a posture of faithful presence.
[Last Things]
If you enjoy this newsletter, please share it with a friend. If you want to join a Bible study, discipleship cohort, or reading group, please get in touch!
Faithful Presence exists to provide whole-life discipleship in the whole of life for the whole of the public square. Join us as we seek renewal in politics and the public square by becoming a Supporting Partner.
Find Us On: LinkedIn | Instagram | Facebook | X | YouTube | Apple & Spotify